dear braylen, tomorrow you are SIX

BK,

On this day five years ago, we were anxiously awaiting your arrival. The bags were packed and stacked by the door, we were so anxious to see your sweet face, to kiss your toes and hold you close. And did we ever? I don’t think we put you down unless you were sleeping.

You came into our lives on April 13th, the tiniest little girl, with perfect features and long fingers. Nearly six years later, I still see that tiny baby girl in you. You’re still tiny in so many ways, when you hold my hand and your fingers wrap around mine, it instantly takes me back.

You might tip the scales at 38 pounds, but I think we’d find that a stretch, and you stand about 45 inches tall. Your heart is the biggest part of you. You are kind and loving and caring. You don’t ever want anyone to be left out or feel sad, you work hard to make everyone feel included and loved. You speak to everyone you meet, you make friends everywhere we go, you bring me out of my own comfort zone and I love you for that.

This year, you started kindergarten, and I still miss you fiercely during the day, just as much as I did when you started back in August. You know what I miss most of all? Your stories and witty conversation, the way you answer my questions, I just miss my sidekick. I want you to tell me about everything when you get home from school, all the things I missed. I am absolutely counting down the days until summer, and I promise I won’t take a single minute for granted.

You are thriving in kindergarten. You tell me wonderful stories and look forward to going to see your teacher and friends every single morning.

And smart? Can we talk about how smart you are? At this point, you read anything we put in front of you. You love math and science. You want to read facts about things and animals, and you want to know how everything works. You memorize whole books and recite crazy facts to me, your little mind is full of wonder and amazement.

You love the color purple and dinosaurs and gymnastics. You love to sing songs at church with your daddy and learn about Jesus. Outside is your favorite place to be, flowers light up your face, your imagination is always at work. You still love the movie Frozen, you know almost every song on Taylor Swift’s 1989 album, you tell me I’m your favorite girl. Your favorite princess is Aurora and you think boys are gross and marriage is crazy because you have to kiss a boy in front of people in your pretty dress.

You love to color and paint and create, there are few things you get in a hurry to do. You love your daddy, he makes your eyes light up. You are the best big sister, and Judson absolutely adores you. You love singing and playing any musical instrument you can get your hands on, you’ll dance anywhere, anytime. You learn things so quickly, >and you’ll try something a million times, until you get it right.

Tomorrow, you are six, and I’ll let it be your day completely, but you should know that it’s my favorite day, too. It’s the day you made me a mother.It’s the day when an amazing thing happened, in a busy and cold operating room, the whole world stopped for a moment. I looked into your eyes and knew that I was forever changed, forever connected, and forever grateful for you.

You make every day an adventure, you make ordinary moments exciting. You bring joy everywhere you go. I couldn’t love you more.